Tracy Daniel-Hardy, Ph.D, is the author of “The Adventures of Butch and Ruby: Chronicles of a Caregiver” and a retired public school district director of technology. She may be contacted at tracy@drtracydanielhardy.com.
I don’t think anyone would argue about the extreme difficulty of being a family caregiver, whether it is caring for an aging loved one, perhaps with dementia, or someone with a disability. But imagine caring for someone who is verbally and/or physically abusive, or just plain mean. This makes an already arduous task even more […]
We have tried many things to make bathing easier for my parents. We now have a good process in place but struggle to get daddy’s cooperation. Although he has not articulated why he’s reluctant to bathe sometimes, I suspect it’s because he prefers to move as little as possible to reduce back and leg pain, […]
During the holidays, many caregivers focus on their inability to participate in the festivities and traditions. As a caregiver myself, I can’t help but notice that our holiday traditions have undergone many makeovers since my childhood — especially now that momma and daddy depend almost solely on us. Life events, including moving from primary to […]
In 1994, the Caregiver Action Network started encouraging the recognition and celebration of family caregivers. Three years later, President Bill Clinton (and every subsequent president), signed a proclamation to recognize November as National Family Caregivers Month. The yearly celebration offers a month full of support, recognition, celebration and community for 53 million-plus family caregivers who […]
Today I watched a video on social media of a friend’s granddaughter baking cupcakes with her dad. Before he could finish demonstrating how to dip and pour the batter into the cupcake tin, the toddler started reaching for the dipper and said, “Let me do it. I want to do it.” Little Karter’s quest for […]
A friend, who is also a caregiver, texted me one evening to share that she felt like she was missing out on many things due to her new caregiving responsibilities. I immediately called to encourage her because the feelings she described were all too familiar. When she answered the phone, her voice started quavering as […]
This caregiving journey has taught be to be patient, observant, flexible and a bit more compassionate. But sometimes, my practical thinking prevents me from being as understanding as others would like. I have been known to say, “Make it make sense!” or “I need it to make sense.” After my caregiving journey started with my […]
Communication often becomes what I describe as a beautiful, awkward dance in which we try to find the right steps to complement the moves of our partner. I find that sometimes my clearly spoken words are not enough in my caregiving journey with my parents, so as a result, I must shift to other methods. […]
Yesterday, I left my parents’ house without washing the dishes. It bothered me, but I walked out and tried not to look back. Although this chore was the last one to complete, I was exhausted. As I began filling the sink, I wiped sweat from my forehead, sighed deeply and turned off the water. I […]
Like many family caregivers, I spend a lot of time anticipating my parents’ needs and behaviors so that I’m prepared to address them. Mentally playing and replaying possible scenarios often consumes my thoughts and keeps me up at night. I subconsciously do this to develop an appropriate response and temper my emotions — or so […]
